If Applebees was a chick, I'd bang her with a condom

NSFW - Naked & Horny - http://imgur.com/a/boTtk#0

NSFW - Amazing Beej at Barnes & Noble - https://vine.co/v/MnDKXldYPvM

NSFW - Subtle tan lines - http://i.imgur.com/99EM5Wg.jpg

TIL the rules to Monopoly clearly state that if a player lands on a property and doesn't buy it, it immediately goes up for auction to the highest bidder. http://m.huffpost.com/us/entry/3366875

"Qatar Instrumental in release of US journalist in Syria"
http://townhall.com/tipsheet/danieldoherty/2014/08/25/us-journalist-freed-in-syria-n1882632

Tim and Eric & Dr. Steve Brule 2014 Tour!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vqe4KQTYtVA

Is this the world's "wooliest" sheep? Australian farmers find never-been-shorn wild sheep
https://twitter.com/BBCNewsAsia/status/504199669770371072/photo/1

Hyperlapse, Instagram's New App, Is Like a $15,000 Video Setup in Your Hand
http://ktla.com/2014/08/26/shooting-range-instructor-fatally-shot-by-9-year-old-girl-learning-to-use-uzi-in-arizona/

Shooting Range Instructor Fatally Shot by 9-Year-Old Girl Learning to Use Uzi in Arizona
http://ktla.com/2014/08/26/shooting-range-instructor-fatally-shot-by-9-year-old-girl-learning-to-use-uzi-in-arizona/

Strange philly murders:
http://www.inquirer.com/front_page/breaking/2_pulled_from_Schuylkill_River_.html

This guy claims David chase told him Tony Soprano didn't die in finale, long but good.
http://www.vox.com/2014/8/27/6006139/did-tony-die-at-the-end-of-the-sopranos

Taser Photoshoot: People Willingly Being Hit With A Stun Gun By Their Loved Ones
http://www.boredpanda.com/taser-photoshoot-patrick-hall/

You'll Never Guess What's In A Starbucks Pumpkin Spice Latte
http://foodbabe.com/2014/08/25/starbucks-pumpkin-spice-latte/

Bullets and burgers!! Name of place where girl killed instructor. USA! USA! Omelets and sawed off shotguns is coming to a town near you soon!
http://www.nbcnews.com/news/us-news/site-arizona-shooting-range-mishap-popular-tourism-attraction-n190081?cid=sm_n_main_1_20140827_30558296

NFL Lolz to the max: https://pbs.twimg.com/media/BwD4H7YIQAAuj7s.png
PFTCommenter ‏@PFTCommenter  24m
hats off to commisionrer Roger Goodell for getting this one rite. Josh Gordon needs to worry more about suiting up and less about shooting up

TIL From 1978 to 2013, CEO compensation in the US, inflation-adjusted, increased 937 percent, and the typical worker's wages rose 10 percent.
http://www.epi.org/publication/ceo-pay-continues-to-rise/?_ga=1.163320380.1693009577.1400793577
That beats college textbooks (864%)
http://www.businessinsider.com/textbook-price-inflation-2014-4

Eww, Boris Becker's elbow, get the fuck outta my face
http://boston.barstoolsports.com/random-thoughts/it-looks-like-boris-becker-has-the-worst-case-of-tennis-elbow-ever/

Sofia Vergara post Emmys NIP SLIP BRO
http://www.gossipcop.com/sofia-vergara-nip-slip-wardrobe-malfunction-emmys-dancing-derek-hough/

Tearjerker Thai Commercial - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cZGghmwUcbQ

Sports Illustrated Just Shoving Russell Wilson's Penis In All Of Our Faces
http://www.barstoolsports.com/chicago/super-page/sports-illustrated-just-shoving-russell-wilsons-penis-in-all-of-our-faces/

This article made me giggle:
http://www.theonion.com/articles/were-going-to-enjoy-this-cocainefueled-mason-jar-r,36779/
"Do you know what I can do? I can walk into any bed and breakfast in America and just take my dick out, right in front of everyone. And no one's going to say shit to me. Because they know that without me, those mason jar light fixtures with a bulb strung through the lid wouldn't exist."